


A red flag

by UnicornofAmber



Series: Random/Vialle [5]
Category: Chronicles of Amber - Roger Zelazny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:13:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27487096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnicornofAmber/pseuds/UnicornofAmber
Summary: Vialle and Random were stuck in the dungeons of Amber for months. At one point, some... womanly issues can no longer be ignored or hidden. (crack!fic)
Relationships: Random/Vialle (Chronicles of Amber)
Series: Random/Vialle [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1561285
Comments: 1
Kudos: 1





	A red flag

Random gritted his teeth when he heard Vialle turn and writhe once again. She’d been doing this for the past couple of hours and honestly, it was aggravating when you were trying to concentrate on a book, instead of the tiny cell they resided in. “Stop turning around!”

The creaking of her bed stopped.

“Random?”

“What?” The prince snapped.

“Do you want my bread and cheese? I’m not hungry.”

Random frowned and lowered his book to glance at his wife. “Why? What's the matter?" The silence grew inside the room, and just when Random thought Vialle wouldn’t answer –

“Cramps,” The blind girl spat out like poison.

"We both ate the same” The prince put his book down and swung his legs off the bed so he was now in a proper sitting position. "Perhaps due to my higher metabolism that you got food poisoning and I didn't-"

The way he spoke was in such a condescending and belittling tone, that Vialle literally could not stomach one more word from his mouth. "I'm not sick from the FOOD, it is my TIME!"

Random blinked. “Your what?”

Vialle’s mouth dropped. "You know, my time of the month? The red flag down there?” With each elaboration of the woman, Random began to increasingly become uncomfortable. “Surely you princes have heard menstruati-“

“Off course I have heard!” Random blurted out. “What do you want me to do about it?”

Now it was Vialle who looked uncomfortable. “I need a red dress, to mask when… I’m leaking.” The blind woman shifted on her bed, and Random grimaced when a red stain was revealed, “And a bath. Oh Lyr, I’d murder for a bath right now.” Vialle whined as she held her hands across her stomach.

"I can help with the last request." Random stood up and strode to the door.

"Ahw, that is so sweet to-" Vialle caught on to Random's words when she heard the choking guard at their door. "No, no, Random let him go-" Vialle crawled out of bed, blindly searched for her husband and began to try and prey Random apart from the guard.

"But you said you’d murder for a bath,” Random replied with her own words.

“I meant metaphorically, not literally!” The moment Vialle heard Random release the guard, the blind woman began to check on him. “Are you alright?”

“I’m… fi- fi-“

“Don’t talk too much. Slowly breathe in and out.”

“What’s going on here?”

Everyone, safe Vialle, turned towards an approaching Caine. “She’s having…cramps,” Random began to explain as Caine turned towards Vialle, “Can you-“

The sailor’s eyes widened when he noted the red stain upon Vialle’s gown, “No. I cannot help with that.” Caine began to wave his hands and distance himself from the two, “She’s your wife and therefore your problem to deal with, brother.”

“My uterus and ovaries are ripping my belly apart, so I’ll make it everyone’s problem if I don’t get my bath!” 

Both princes began to grimace.

“What’s goin-“

“Cramps!” the four simultaneously shouted to Flora, who immediately rushed towards Vialle.

“Oh poor thing, look at you. I know just what you need.” The princess took Vialle’s arm in hers, and the three men let out a collective sigh of relief. “Random, you come with us.”

_“What?!”_

“I’m not going to be washing the red stains out of her bed and gown everytime your wife has her time, you know,” Flora’s nails began to dig in Random’s arm, and the princess guided the couple to her chambers.

While Vialle went to wash herself, Random got a grueling crash course on how to wash red stains out of various fabrics, with his snickering brothers below as background music.

“You look as if you’ve never seen blood before,” Flora scolded when Random would barely touch the cloth with a finger. The blonde gripped his hand and forced the man to scrub.

“I have!” Random snapped at her as he yanked his hand free, gaining him a deadpanned look from Flora, “I never have seen this blood before, I mean!”

Flora rolled her eyes, “You men are such crybabies. Now where have I-” The princess began to dig into various purses before finally finding what she was looking for. “Ah, here it is.” Just then Vialle came out of Flora’s bathroom, freshly washed and in a red dress, “Here you go, sweetie. It will help you from getting stains in the future.” Flora began to explain as she put the tampons in Vialle’s hand. “Insert it down there, and make sure to change it every few hours… which remind me, how do Rebmans hide their periods?”

Random quickly tuned out of the conversation and began to scrub like his life depended on it. He became so focused on it, that he yelped when a hand was placed upon his shoulder.

“Is everything alright here?” Vialle softly asked.

“Its all washed out, now. It just needs to dry.” Random felt her hand travel from his shoulder to his arm and relaxed a little bit.

“You did not need to do that, you know.”

“Yes, well, if it spares you some humiliation in the future…” Random’s sentence trailed off and Vialle frowned when she heard Julian and Caine whisper and snort below.

The blind woman sought for the stained water, took up the bowl, and strode towards the window.

“No, wait Vialle –“ Horrified, Random watched as his wife emptied it. Immediately, the screams of his brothers began to reach his ears.

“RANDOM!”

“I’ll GUT YOU FOR THIS!”

“You might as well empty the other bowl,” Vialle proposed.

Slowly, a grin began to appear on Random’s face. The prince reached for the bowl, went towards the window and emptied it out as well. Chuckling, the prince looked at the stained figures of his brothers at Vialle’s side. “How do you feel?”

“I couldn’t be better.”


End file.
